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ASSET

$ASS paired with BUTTCOIN
The only assets that never leave

The token for people who actually hold. "We don't pump. We sit." Every transfer taxes 3% and rains pure Buttcoin on holders. You're not chasing pumps — you're collecting while you sit.

Contract Not launched yet

There is no contract address yet. Anyone posting one right now is lying to you.

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DIAMOND HANDS ✦ SOFT CHEEKS ✦ WE SIT ✦ YOU GET PAID IN BUTTCOIN ✦ 

How The Sitting Pays

Three steps. Two of them are just sitting.

01

You sit

Buy $ASS. Then do the hardest thing in crypto: nothing at all. No staking, no locking, no claiming, no dashboard to babysit.

02

Everyone else moves

Every $ASS transfer carries a 3% tax, baked into the token itself at mint. Buys, sells, wallet-to-wallet sends — all of it feeds the pot.

03

It rains Buttcoin

Once the pot clears $50, StonkFun splits it pro-rata across every wallet holding at least $20 of $ASS at that moment — in pure Buttcoin, straight to your wallet. You did not have to get up.

✦ RESPECT WHERE IT'S DUE

Buttcoin walked so we could sit.

In May 2011 — two years before Dogecoin, when memecoins were not yet a category — someone on Something Awful asked the question that named the entire genre:

"Has anyone called them buttcoins yet?"

That line became Buttcoin.org, then r/Buttcoin, then fifteen years of the sharpest crypto satire on the internet, and finally a real Solana token. It is the original. Every memecoin since owes it a royalty.

So we pay ours. $ASS is paired against Buttcoin, which means every reward that reaches a holder is paid in Buttcoin. We are not borrowing the joke — we are buying it, forever, on every single transfer.

buttcoin.money ↗ @ButtCoin ↗ Buttcoin Foundation ↗
The lineage
Bitcoin
2009
OG ✦
Buttcoin
2011
ASSET
2026

They named the genre. We just decided to sit in it.

Buttcoin The Buttcoin you get paid in
Cm6fNnMk7NfzStP9CZpsQA2v3jjzbcYGAxdJySmHpump

Several Solana tokens call themselves Buttcoin. This is the one $ASS is paired against, and the only one that will ever land in your wallet. Check the address, not the name.

Solscan ↗ DEX Screener ↗ Jupiter ↗
Since 2011 ★ The meme that named all memecoins ★ Now our reward token

ASSET is an independent project. It is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or operated by Buttcoin, the Buttcoin Foundation, or StonkFun. Buttcoin is their meme and their token — we are simply fans that pay rent.

Built On StonkFun

The launchpad that made any of this possible

Every other launchpad asks one question: how much SOL. StonkFun asked a better one — what if a coin could be paired against anything at all? Stocks, currencies, commodities, collectibles, or somebody else's meme.

That single idea is the entire reason $ASS can pay you in Buttcoin instead of the same SOL as everyone else. We did not build a reward contract. We did not write a staking dApp. We picked a pair, and StonkFun did the rest.

Pair with anything

Hundreds of quote assets across nine categories. We only ever wanted one of them, and it was there waiting.

Rewards live in the mint

The holder tax is a Token-2022 transfer fee signed into the token itself. It cannot be switched off, tuned down, or quietly removed later — not by them, and not by us.

Liquidity stays put

Launches ride a Raydium LaunchLab bonding curve and graduate into a real Raydium pool with the LP position permanently locked. Mint and freeze authority are revoked.

The flywheel burns

A share of every trade funds continuous buybacks and burns across the platform's top coins, running every few minutes. Their fee model eats supply instead of printing it.

stonkfun.xyz ↗ @LaunchOnSF ↗ Telegram ↗

Tokenomics

Short, because there isn't much to it

Supply
1,000,000,000
Network
Solana
Launchpad
StonkFun
Paired against
Buttcoin 🍑
DEX tax
3% — permanent
Rewards paid in
Buttcoin
Liquidity
Locked
Mint / freeze
Revoked
Solana Contract Address
Not launched yet — check back at launch
⚡ HOW TO START SITTING ⚡

Not live yet.

$ASS has not launched. There is no contract address, no pool, and nothing to buy — so there is nothing to ape into and no reason to trust a link that says otherwise.

When it goes live, this section fills in with the real address and the real venue. Until then, the only thing to do is the thing we're best at: sit.

What is StonkFun? ↗ Follow for the launch
Diamond hands ★ Soft cheeks ★ Paid in Buttcoin

Roadmap

We are extremely committed to this plan

Phase 1
Launch
Sit
Phase 2
Get listed somewhere
Sit harder
Phase 3
Hit seven figures
Still sitting
Phase 4
Official residual token of Solana
Eternal sit
Buttcoin forever. 🍑

Join the Ass Gang

Cheek Holders · Certified Sitters · no chairs provided